A full bodied wine and a full bodied woman. What more does a man want? Well… you can have that too 😘 Dinner at one of my all time favourite restaurants. I loved the langoustines – my favourite shellfish.


Sometimes I think of all the people in the world who could have an experience like this but they’re risk adverse. Nothing truly wonderful will ever happen to people who aren’t willing to take risks. And so I feel grateful to the risk takers and luxury lovers and the experiences we share. We found the antidote: Living life on our own terms and not giving a damn what anyone else thinks! For every person reading this who has spent time in my company, there’s another 50 who don’t have the guts. Whilst others wring their hands, we raise our glasses. Whilst others worry about tomorrow, we live for today. Some exciting moments we have on a random Tuesday afternoon… some people will never feel such a feeling in their entire lives.


We are the lucky ones. Thanks for being part of the most fantastic story! ❤️

Photo Diary 2

Below: View from my outdoor work out. A special bottle to celebrate. Touchdown in a mystery location ☀️. My go-so salad that I always make at home: grated beetroot and carrot, with parsley, spring onion, a little vinegar, lemon, salt, and olive oil. It’s so good!

Below: Best attempt at looking innocent. Generous gifts. Dinner at 2 Michelin Star Kitchen Table – not the best experience – I loved it before but I wouldn’t go back. Lobster lover.

Below: Touchdown in St Andrews, Scotland. Not my most glamorous state but my goal is to turn heads not raise eyebrows! Loved this golf trip and cant wait to improve my non existent skills. Lobster again (it’s a hard knock life) ladies lunch at The Dorchester. Retail therapy (bought this cute outfit)

Below: Touchdown in Milano – a whirlwind 24 hours of sun, shopping, and secret memories. Co-pilot Billie (my main function was decorative). Putting in work, pilates class.

Photo Diary

It’s been an eventful month or so. I had many highlights so decided to split them into 2 posts. Here is the first:

Below: French 75 (my favourite cocktail) tight jeans and heels combo. My favourite photo – The Rolling Stones – at the Iconic Images Gallery. I love silk! Treated myself to the pink set at Selfridges. Tried Kima, a new and very well reviewed Greek restaurant local to me. You pick a fish and they prepare it in 4 ways. Yes, I ate the fish heads 🤪

Below: Lingerie addiction satisfied (for now!) The Kitchen and nigiri at Niju, a new sushi restaurant by my favourite ever sushi chef (Endo Kazutoshi). Rathfinny, a really delicious English Sparling wine; made in the same method as Champagne, I was a guest at their winery in Sussex last year and loved the experience so always order it when I see it. 

Below: Another sushi restaurant (a Japanese girlfriend of mine was in town so we did a lot), the private dining experience at Evernight restaurant. Loafer season is finally here. Tried on a million outfits and ended up leaving with nothing…. sometimes its like that – though not often! Delicious Mediterranean and Israeli food at a local spot that I’m keeping to myself (have to gatekeep some of my favourite local spots or I’ll never get a reservation!)

Below: Dinner at 3 Michelin Star Core by Clare Smyth – this has to be in my top 3 fine dining in London – absolutely excellent. This was my second time going but I’m cutting down on drinking so I only had 1 glass of wine and wondered if I would enjoy it the same – I did, this is such a great restaurant. Just wanted to show you how massive this red pepper is. Pretty flowers. Generous gifts.

Below: At my golf lesson. Pulpo a galega, a famous spanish tapas dish from Galicia of octopus, peeled boiled potatoes, paprika and plenty olive oil – here was my first attempt at cooking it myself. Spotted one of my favourite cars (SL280). Just reminding you how nice my bum is, though if you’ve ever experienced it in real life it’s unlikely you would ever forget.

Boys don’t make passes…

at girls who wear glasses. Or do they…


2 months ago I finally got around to replacing my glasses which I squished less than a week after I bought them (during lockdown). I always wear my lenses, but decided the time may be right to occasionally switch things up. This time I took a friend with me to the opticians which turned out to be such a great idea as she works in fashion and really gave a great second opinion and I am so happy with the choices I made. I opted for 2 pairs, both by Tom Ford – his glasses always suit my face. An everyday pair (which also come with magnetic tinted lenses to turn them into sunglasses), and a more bold, statement pair which I’ve worn a few times recently and gotten a lot of compliments on. Those are my favourites as I’m a maximalist: More is more! One of the small and funny ironies of course is that when you put your glasses down you often cant find them… because you don’t have your glasses on so can’t see 😂 


The glasses definitely give me a bit of an alter ego, especially because I noticed people react differently to me when I’m wearing them, and I also feel sexy wearing them. Maybe you like them too? If so, feel free to request! 


Billie ❤️

Cool idea! 3 looks in one
New glasses and my favourite vase by Jonathan Adler. I love good design!
If anyone asks I'm your new Personal Assistant. It's technically not a lie.
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Alcole Studios

In love with my new photoshoot with this legendary photographer who is known for shooting some of the most gorgeous black women in America. It may surprise you how many photographers don’t know how to shoot brown skin (one shoot I did I had to scrap all the images, they made me look grey!), whereas this particular photographer knows how to capture my skin tone and essence perfectly. I’m grateful for this opportunity, as Alcole Studios, usually based in America, flew to London for the day specifically to shoot only me.


I had a really strong sense of what I wanted from this shoot (outfits, and 2 locations which I scouted myself) got exactly what I hoped for. This was the most confident I have felt on a shoot. Particularly when I shoot “blogger style” (fashion outfits on the street) I am extremely nervous. The reason is of course when you shoot street photography or public spaces everyone is staring at you, and in my case you will not believe some of the comments some people have made. All positive but makes me feel self conscious. Also as the photographer I shoot fashion with is a personal friend of mine, so maybe I find it more difficult switching to model mode around her. I tend to like women who have very direct communication style (which she does as she is Russian) she is constantly saying to me “WHY ARE YOU SCARED! YOU CANT BE SCARED AND SEXY! DONT WORRY ABOUT PEOPLE LOOKING AT YOU!” and so on. Also of course typically there is an element of Guerrilla tactics with street style photography – you are often using hotels or properties without explicit permission, or have a few moments when a street is empty, so you have to shoot very quickly and efficiently which doesn’t work for me because I take 10 mins just to feel relaxed. The professional photos in my gallery are split between 6 photographers.


Anyhow, with 2 private locations and an extremely experienced photographer, Alcole Studios was a very easy shoot. What you also hope for in a photographer is that they will have a creative eye for poses and framing the photos. Many people have a flippant view of photography, but there is a big difference between a good and a great photographer, and it’s always to do with how inherently creative they are as a person. These photos the raw unedited images I could have posted right away as they were so good. I realised that some of the outfits I picked were gifts that I have received from generous suitors, so thank you for your contribution. I have immortalised your generosity in these new images – I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!

I arrive at the bar in a sexy dress and high heels. My order is a French 75 and chocolate mousse because I have a sweet tooth and love indulgence. I pull my chair closer to you. You stroke my legs and watch me eat it. I’m excited to meet you. I pull my chair closer to you.


Champagne and gourmet hot dogs at Bubbledogs 🥂 Before it shut, Bubbledogs was such an iconic London restaurant, the concept being luxurious hot dogs, and an epic Champagne list (50+ bottles to choose from). So glad to see it reopened on Park Lane, and loved the wagyu and truffle hot dog 😍 

You Are Who You Eat

I mean, what you eat 😇


It’s no secret that I love to cook – although dining out is of course another one of my passions. I thought I would share with you some of my recent simple recipes which I’ve put together at home. This is one of my favourite seasons for ingredients: Asparagus, crab, summer fruits, fresh peas, and the most flavoursome tomatoes. I’m not ashamed to say that for the past few years I have used the Selfridges Food Hall as my supermarket (such great produce there), and I’m also a big fan of Bayley and Sage, and the other small delis and shops in my area. Women who love food love sex of course, we are greedy for all life’s sensual experiences.


At home I cook mostly Mediterranean (Italian, French, Spanish, and/or Greek inspired), Middle Eastern, and Asian food. All these recipes I make up as I go along in the market based on my mood and what’s in season. I can do more complicated things of course, but this is how I typically eat at home. I am very particular about my ingredients, for example I spent many hours researching the very best olive oil (I prefer Greek to Italian, but could not find Greek that fitted my requirements so I guess we shall just have to go there to get the Greek oil directly 😙). In Europe, with olive oil there is just 1 harvest a year (winter). And like any fresh ingredient the moment the oil is bottled, it starts to deteriorate in quality and flavour. So for example if the one harvest is in November, and you buy your oil in October, it has definitely been sat around for nearly a year. Regular olive oil bottles won’t tell you when it was harvested, but the very top quality olive oils will put the date on the bottle, similar to how wine is dated. I have written too much about olive oil so at the very bottom of this blog I have continued the olive oil lecture only if you’re interested. I managed to find one that had been pressed just one month before, and this is the basis for a lot of my cooking. I also take one spoon a day as it’s so good for you – although not an enjoyable experience by itself!). Some days of course I am lazy or in a rush, but when I decide to cook properly I will go to great lengths to get really good ingredients. I love to shop so I just apply that skill to my ingredients. I find the process very therapeutic.


Also, I like to present my food beautifully, even if I am not entertaining guests, as I’m sure you agree, we eat with our eyes first 😉


On my menu:

Honey and soy salmon with prawn dumplings, asparagus and chilli dipping sauce
Salad of king prawns, asparagus, mango, courgette, chilli, tomato, cucumber, and red pepper
Grilled peppers. Love them cold as as a salad with anchovies, thyme, olive oil, and fried garlic.
Feta and watermelon salad with mint oil, mint, lime, pink peppercorn, and sumac
Simple prawn linguine, made with lots of olive oil, a little garlic, and white wine
Slow cooked Lamb kleftiko with Greek Salad
Rainbow fried rice with crab, shrimp, kimchi, and sesame
Bresaola and burrata salad with grilled courgette, strawberries, and tomatoes
Crispy potatoes with prawns, harissa yoghurt, chilli and chive

*No I wont cook it for you. I demand a dinner date instead 😘

More on Olive oil (a bit boring)


So what you want is a single estate olive oil: all olives from the same trees, from the same place, harvested at the same time, then cold pressed together, and then you want to buy the oil as soon as possible after it has been made, and also unfiltered. If you were being very strict about freshness, you would note that in Europe they harvest in the winter, so in winter you would buy from Europe, and in the summer, you would buy from the southern hemisphere (South America, south Africa, Australia etc, which have a summer harvest). The truth is it doesn’t really matter too much from a taste perspective, but olive oil has other great healthy components that you only benefit from if the oil is fresh. In the UK of course the idea of buying Australian Olive oil would be seen as outrageous, but the truth is, for half the year, it is much fresher than the oil from Europe. The most simple way to find true quality olive oil is to Google “2023 olive oil”. You probably think I work for the Olive Oil Society (if such a thing exists haha) no, I just somehow went down a rabbit hole when buying oil and now buying fresh oil is something I make a small effort to do. I realised that within reason, anything is interesting if you bother to find out more about it. Could have spent an hour scrolling on Instagram I suppose but I decided to take the time to find great olive oil instead.


(long read, and a bit boring) 


There’s a guy I follow on my Twitter account (no, I’m never going to refer to it as “X”) who does commentary on men’s style, and today I read one of his tweets which said that AI would never be able to replace a human stylist, as a stylist knows about the society, culture, personality etc that the person belongs to and so is better able to pick an outfit for a person than AI which just churns out generic answers. He also said that of course what AI can’t do is answer the question “Who am I?”


Well, this got me thinking, as although I’m not an AI fatalist I am keeping up weekly with the progress of AI (lightning speed progress) and of course it is not the AI that has the advantage it’s the human who knows hot to utilise it. Here’s an example:

Firstly there’s a conflation between ChatGPT and AI. ChatGPT is just one program, that’s free to use and for everybody. Therefore of course the answers are generic. And even if it wasn’t, even the best stylist would still ask you many questions about yourself and take your measurements before making their suggestions. AI (the wider technology) could be used by a stylist for example to make their own program where the user pays a nominal amount to subscribe and the suggestions given are in the style of that stylist. Or the stylist could make their AI prohibitively expensive and/or only license it to people they want to have it. Or you could do both. A better example (that someone less fashion minded might relate to more) is for example a very famous and successful interior designer who works on large projects (luxury hotels, etc) may decide to release an AI programme where, “everyday” users looking to decorate their home could input the dimensions, and the AI would create the interior design plan of the famous interior designer they love, but don’t have access to. Let’s call the interior designer Sophie. Sophie’s interior design package could offer the user 30 different options for the space they wish to decorate and could further be monetised by product placement and so on. In fact, you might like a particular table lamp by an Italian designer, and you can either buy it directly through the program, or the AI can also scan the entire internet and show you similar alternative options at all price points. Whilst some people may only discover a side table they now see would look great in the hallway, or realise that shelves next to the television would be a good idea (as per the AI suggestion,) other users may decide to buy the entire interiors package that the AI has created- and within the coming weeks, the blank canvas of a new home becomes a gorgeous space in the style of your favourite interior designer with everything from cushions to beds and cutlery being taken care of in one purchase.


This subscription model will be somewhat limited by the fact that after most people have used the AI program and found ideas for the spare room, or kitted out their house, or ordered the kitchen they wanted etc etc, they will of course unsubscribe from the program. However what Sophie could also do is have a more expensive licensing package that other interior designers could pay to use. This would be a more detailed trade/industry centric package that would include suppliers, higher specification interiors and perhaps 500 potential design solutions as opposed to the 30 potential given on the consumer-level AI. To protect the value and exclusivity of this more expensive package, it could be limited to only 20 interior design houses in the world, and priced at something like £50,000 a year, with the license only being renewed by Sophies request at the end of the year. Having the package ads a lot of value to the interior design studio using it, and equates to £1M in revenue for Sophie. The £50,000 licence sounds like a lot but it isn’t in the schemes of big designers and houses. Top interior designer Kelly Wearsler charges $50,000 – $100,000 per event for her expertise, so you can only imagine what she would charge to consult. Access to Kelly’s design brain for a year at £50,000 is comparatively good value. In fact if the AI program was truly excellent or available to even less people, the license could easily command a higher price.


In this way AI is not replacing Sophie, it is expanding her reach (and her income!). I think the combination of human + AI is what’s most appealing and most marketable. Other new technology would be integrated (for a clothing stylist, perhaps your whole body could be scanned during the signing up process, and therefore the clothes suggested fit your stature perfectly) or the interior design tech would have the option of integrating a virtual reality headset (this already exists in some interior design showrooms), allowing you to walk through your new home, switching seamlessly between the 50 different possibilities. 


In recent years consumers appear to have rallied against the idea of “paying for information”, however there is a big difference between generic information, and information that is perfectly tailored to you, given by (or in the style of) someone who’s expertise you trust, or a creative who you admire. Many can’t afford a world leading stylist, Interior designer, or celebrity personal trainer, but they can afford a small(ish) subscription fee for a slice of the experience, that feels very much like the real experience. And crucially, particularly in the luxury market, no matter how many people are willing to hire Sophie, or indeed Kelly, she can only ever be in one place at a time. Until now. I also strongly dispute the idea that AI could never know someone better than they know themselves. Not a week goes by when I don’t get an add on Google for something I just thought about, or of a small obscure brand I’ve never heard of that suits my taste just perfectly. Think of all the people you know, who are in denial about something that you can see very clearly. I think it’s very possible to know or understand more of a person than they do of themselves, especially when it comes to shallow things like stylistic taste. I would guess that Google knows more about you than anyone, after all it’s the only one who knows you are here reading this. You only have to go to the same hotel or restaurant a handful of times before they can half know and half predict exactly what you want. It’s embarrassing almost, I scroll through Amazon and they’ve done a good job of picking out my favourite things, even if I’ve never ordered them before. And there I was thinking that I’m the only woman on earth who likes Chanel perfume, chocolate, and self help books 😤 


So anyway… that is my view of one of the many ways AI could be used to improve the lives of others and perhaps help creatives expand their reach. This is of course going to happen in the fun interim period between now and when it takes over and kills us all 🥳😂


Fortunately for my chosen side-hustle, I don’t predict the robot girlfriends are arriving any time soon*, so how about that dinner date?


Billie ❤️


* even if the robot girlfriends are arriving soon, I very much doubt they’d have the audacity to make one with a p**** as juicy as mine 😘


Men who:
✅ Are good at planning 
✅ Are reliable
✅ Give good massages
✅ Are open minded
✅ Enjoy luxury
✅ Love to travel
✅ Easy going
✅ Can laugh at themselves
✅ Are chivalrous
✅ Like intimacy
✅ Have calming energy
= my type 🏆
🚫 Afraid to enjoy life
🚫 Still upset about something that happened in 1996
🚫 Can’t take a joke
🚫 Narcissist
🚫 Over promise but don’t deliver
🚫 Chaotic
🚫 Narrow minded
🚫 Can’t live in the moment
🚫 Thinks the woman should be the man
🚫 Vegan
🚫 Arsenal supporters
= 🏃🏾‍♀️🚫😂😂😂

Asador Extebarri

Lunch with friends at #4 restaurant in the world, Asador Extebarri, in the Basque region, Spain 🇪🇸
One of the hardest restaurants to book (tried for 2 years, and finally secured a table through an introduction). A masterclass in simplicity and a very important experience in my life as a foodie! Then travelled into San Sebastian for 2 days of very best tapas, wines and vermouth. My love affair with Spain continues… I shall tell you more in person.


I’m one of those people who is always travelling but somehow hasn’t gotten round to exploring much of my own country. I’ve definitely been to more places in France or Italy than I have in the UK. A classic example of not appreciating what’s on your doorstep! So it was a pleasure to accept an invitation to Bath, a beautiful historic town, and the perfect environment to curate a special experience.

Memories of Mallorca

[Long Read]


I can remember my first visit to Mallorca as if it were yesterday. Flying to Palma is one of those destinations where half the plane is on their way to one type of holiday (The Magaluf party crowd) and the other half are on their way to an entirely different type of holiday (one of endless tapas, day boats, and narrow streets packed with small shops and tiny churches). But there’s another side to Mallorca which I also enjoy, a few hours drive away from Palma where it’s much quieter. This style a travel agents refer to as “barefoot luxury”. Well, it’s not quite barefoot luxury for a high heels addict like me, but this expression is about the easygoing nature of being in a more remote location. Day to day life is reduced to a new reality; a reality where each day there are only 2 important decisions to make: what do I want to eat, and how many times do I fancy a ****?


They say life is simple and of course the truth is it isn’t, but Mallorca has always been one of my happy places. It offers me everything I look for in a sunny holiday: the dining (fantastic Mallorca cuisine which has its own identity separate from mainland Spain), the golf (on holiday there’s only one way to play golf with me and that’s 9 holes, then get tipsy in the clubhouse then back to the hotel for a celebratory 10th and 11th hole), then of course there’s the natural beauty of the place – I love the dramatic cliff edges, mile high pine trees, and blue sea only comparable to the Caribbean and certain parts of Greece. What else? The history in Palma… one day I went for a morning walk with no map and stumbled across so many gorgeous old buildings and the massive cathedral. Whereas in some parts of Europe the churches feel like a place to be punished, in much of the Mediterranean they are a place of endless wonder and inspiration. Although I’m not religious, I still find so much beauty in religious buildings. Some of these buildings I feel completely overwhelmed by the architecture and beauty when I walk in. No matter how many times I enter a space like this every single time I look up to the ceiling and think “how on earth did they build this thing 500 years ago?!”


This is a bit off topic but someone once told me the reason the airport in Palma is so massive and modern is that one of the American states ordered an airport (you know what I mean, commissioned to have one made) and then apparently there was some issue with this deal and it fell apart and so somehow Palma ended up with an airport intended for a much larger place. I’ve never fact-checked this story as I loved it so much so prefer to believe it 🙂


Anyway back to why I love Mallorca. The fine dining there is a very mixed bag (mostly not good), but dining at 2 Michelin Star Voro on my most recent visit was a real treat and an excellent experience. Oh to sip a glass of chilled cava on the terrace as the sun goes down before such a creative and brilliant meal at the restaurant. I also love the tapas and local ingredients, it’s so easy to eat well here because the produce and seafood is so good. On another previous visit staying at a villa it was such a joy to visit the local market and come up with a simple dish of grilled fish with grilled red pepper salad, which was very much appreciated by my company. This was the first time I had an experience in a villa and it was very enjoyable. It doesn’t work for everyone I’m sure but for me it was really perfect, a nice slow pace of holiday and also cooking which is one of my passions (you light the BBQ and choose the wines, I will do the rest).


I love the sea and when I’m not eating everything in it, being on it works too. Mallorca is an ideal place for a day trip on a boat, sailing paddle board, or even just the lovely feeling of enjoying a lunch by the sea, with the sea breeze and beautiful views to compliment the food. I love the seafood! Juicy prawns and local lobster are on many of the menus, and of course Spanish people are so naturally warm and hospitable. Some times in the UK, or in London at least, it’s starting to feel like a lot of people are becoming increasingly cold and miserable, but in Spain I feel the zest for life in the culture, something I really enjoy as I am a warm blooded person myself. Some sunshine and being away from home is such a remedy for life’s stresses, and of course when travelling with a romantic partner, everything is better. When I used to have more time I would solo travel a lot, and I had some great experiences, but all my favourite memories are of course of travelling with a lover. I am a deeply romantic person, it’s part of my DNA. Romance for me is an erotic experience, it turns me on. I love to get dressed up for dinner, to have my thigh rubbed in the back of a taxi, to walk into our hotel room and see a gift on the table. A holiday as I’m sure you know is less than half of the magic, by which I mean you can be in the most beautiful place, at the best hotel, with perfect weather and everything you could want but if you are with the wrong person that slice of paradise can feel like hell. However this scenario with a lover who you have attraction, humour, and connection with is my favourite experience available on this earth. 


As an aside, it’s said in life that you attract the things you fear, so I want to make it very clear how ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED I am of being taken to the Maldives. So afraid 🥲


Mallorca is also one of the few places where I’ve been to the same hotels a few times (I’m a real slut when it comes to travelling, I tend to like trying new places every time), however here there are a couple of adults only hotels in Canyamel which I adore and are exactly my style of super high quality but with no annoying people filming everything for TikTok). I have to go to adults only hotels because kids love me and no sooner have I sat down and reached for my Vogue magazine than someone’s 3 year old comes running at me with an iPad, and it’s goodbye Bond Girl, and hello free childcare. 30 minutes later I’ve been forced against my will to learn the Peppa Pig dance and the purpose of the holiday (me, you, adventures, blowjob on a balcony etc etc) is lost completely.


For a longer trip it’s also nice to attempt a hike (by hike I mean slightly challenging long walk), as the views of the island are spectacular and parts are very steep which makes for a good workout if you like that sort of thing (which I do). Spain is often overlooked as a luxury destination but two of my favourite places in Europe, Mallorca and Madrid, have both given me so many great memories and special experiences, this destination will always have a special place in my heart.


Why sex is better on holiday is one of those unanswerable questions like why does British Airways class itself as a premium airline when once they gave me (I kid you not) nothing but a bag of crisps and some nuts on a 6 hour flight. I’ve always said there’s a time and a place for a mouth full of nuts but this most certainly wasn’t it. 


I have 3 main theories as to why intimacy with a lover feels even better overseas:


  1. Because it’s not on a schedule. It can be quite stressful giving yourself a tiny window of time in which everything should happen. Longer trips allow for spontaneous desire. This is the most natural and exciting way to have an erotic experience.
  2. Because when you’re at home you can’t dial “0” on your phone and order an Aperol spritz immediately after. Of course the convenience and luxury of a hotel adds some to the pleasure and makes it feel more naughty.
  3. You’re happier. A sommelier I know says “never waste a good wine on a bad mood”. And I really agree with this. The reason he says this is because when you’re in a good mood, you get the most out of any good experience you have. So maybe in simply being relaxed and happy on holiday, intimacy feels better because you’re in the best mental and physical state to receive it.


I was supposed to be talking about Mallorca, anyway, I must be off… Here’s to our next adventure 🥂


Big kiss,

Billie ❤️

A Dinner Date, 3 Ways

Menu 1

For the Luxury Lover


My outfit: A chic cocktail dress or impeccably fitted trouser suit, tailored jumpsuit or another stylish and sophisticated outfit. I may run some ideas past you first. High heels and killer lingerie underneath are mandatory of course. Nice handbag, beautiful diamond jewellery, Hermes fragrance.


We shall eat: At one of the cities many quality fine dining restaurants. A gastronomic experience with charming company is the injection of glamour, luxury and lust you’ve been craving. Shall we go for the tasting menu? Then back to the hotel for some bubbles (and a hands on inspection of that killer lingerie).


Benefits: Have you ever had your **** ****** by a woman with lips perfectly painted in red Chanel lipstick? I think not! Some well deserved decadence: More is more! 🥂


Menu 2

For the Leisure Lover


My outfit: Impossibly tight jeans, a flirty top and heels, or perhaps a cosy knitted dress and knee high boots (underwear is very much optional), otherwise maybe my signature leather pants (such a threat to public health that they’ve been banned by the EU). Enjoy a moment of sensual escapism with flirtatious, feminine company.


We shall eat: At one of the cities many quality small plates restaurants. Maybe a busy tapas bar, a rustic and romantic little Italian, or trendy Japanese restaurant where I will send you a naughty photo from the bathroom then order a lychee martini and you will be a gentleman and let me eat the last piece of sashimi 😇


Benefits: Watching me wiggle through the restaurant in leather pants without grabbing my bum (I wouldn’t mind) is almost as frustrating as trying to get me out of them. Who doesn’t love a well packaged dessert?



Menu 3

For the Lounge Lover


My Outfit: A bath robe and nothing else. I arrived in nothing but a full length coat and heels so I thought I’d continue the trend. Perhaps some handcuffs if the mood takes us.


We shall eat: In the room, as we are having a lazy and luxurious day so can’t be bothered to venture outside. Our luxury nudist camp is a much more comfortable proposition. You mustn’t forget my order as it isn’t at all complicated (chicken Caesar salad although ideally with prawns instead, with the dressing on the side, olive oil, black pepper and chilli flakes if they’ve got them and also glass of rosé Champagne. And a fruit plate or chocolate fondant depending on how I feel so probably best to order both. Hope you can remember all that 😂)


Benefits: A bubble bath is the perfect way to unwind whilst we wait for our food to arrive. I’m very good at massages – how about you? We’ve decided to watch a film together but of course you’ve fallen asleep shortly after the opening scene. It’s a good job I’m a morning person: a sleepover then breakfast in bed? Why not!

Life Lately

(From top left): Touchdown in Tuscany; Outfit du Jour; Favourite salad to make at home: Bresaola, tomatoes, aged parmesan, oregano; Treats from Chanel, Dinner Noma, Copenhagen; Wish list treat 😍; Skiing in Norway (managed 2 black slopes, somehow!); Trying out a new grip with my 8 iron; 24hrs, 5 pairs of shoes – I don’t make the rules 😇; Think Pink; Touchdown in Lisbon; Dinner at my favourite Mayfair pub.